Him: Hi, my name is "Head Supervising Specialist at So-and-So-we-beat-the-Dot-Com-Crash-and-went-on-to-make-Super-Sized-Straws Productions".
Me: Well... uh... hi. Nice to meet you...
Him: Did you meet my friend, "Top Marketing Executive for We-spit-on-your-spleen-Jocoby Spyers and Lyers"?
Me: ...er... no, not yet..., but he sounds... er... nice.
Him: And, this is his friend, " I-make-Big-Bucks-and-Live-Alone-by-my-Asian-Stone-Pool-with-Babbling-Creek-and-Jakuzzi".
Me: ... why... er... I suppose the pleasure is mine!
Now..., maybe it's just me. Or maybe it's because I'm in southern California. But..., it seems that the replacement of Self and Personal Character by Job Title is a tad bit obscure and unnecessary.
I mean..., since when do we need a new rim job on our zero-to-seventy bum to present our attributes and quirkishly divine qualities??
Personally, I can't remember a time when I met an outstandingly clever and witty conversationalist who prefaced his intelligence, puns and sociability with: "And, just to be clear: I'm Directing Designer for the nation-wide Dung Displays at Wallmart"...
But..., then again..., maybe that's just me....
Maybe I'm falsely accustomed to meeting grounded folk who don't find it necessary to smother their social attributes with job-title toppings...
Maybe I've been unnaturally lucky enough to know people who prefer to sprinkle their lives with humour and honesty rather than drenching their doodles with pretense and masks of check-paid corporate titles... Maybe, in my cheesy world of travel, I have seen only those who notice (now..., I hate to trickle cliches, but...) "the bigger picture".
Or maybe..., I'm just jealous.
... because, afterall..., I can't say I'm the Director of "Digression Dissemination" at Starbuck's multi-motleyed Monopoly.
quite yet...
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5 comments:
Soon I'll be introducing myself as "guy-who-makes-you-burritos-at-taco-bell"!
...
I neither have an important job title nor an interesting personality - that's why I'm thankful I have a really great body!
As the current adminstrator of asinine and arguably allowable aardvark antics and musings, I would like to agree wholeheartedly with your post. It's just too much to say, I swear. Although lying to people can be just as much fun...
cap'n rich- Thanks for the promotion at your ship-in-bottle corp. I no longer feel the need to get that purple suade interior in my honeysuckle yellow Ferrari.
dunzo- well.. I just hope you don't expect us all to apply our own "fire sauce"...
dingobear- afterall..., "He who possesses a tight ass, achieves great fortune."
nico- glad there are still the strong few, working in your field! The banal banter of aardvarks just doesn't get the attention it once did...
BTW, miss you and that rising sunset land that keeps you!
I am the director of inconsequential decision making affecting handicapped widget makers with big noses. Yup, a tough job but someone has to do it.
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