Sunday, July 30, 2006

Big Party, No Pandemonium

They didn’t try to feel me up.

They didn’t ask to look through my bag.

They didn’t even bother to inquire whether or not I was concealing a bloody, man-slaughtering mandolin in my sock.

It was all very strange.

If this was Seattle’s “biggest, craziest” outdoor musical Big Bang of the summer…, well…, let’s just call it soft and sweetly refreshing.

Where were the outlandishly deranged assholes with existential “beef”? Where were the violence-threatening eco-terrorists, the gekko-footed wall-climbers with odd inclinations, the crafty wallet appropriators, the stool-starting Gangstas with attitude, sneaky new-but-used cocaine salesmen, the mad audience-exciting movers and shakers of silliness/insanity, and the crowd-cramping cannibals offering cheap carne-on-e-stick, guey??

I just didn’t see them.
(…or, at least…, I didn’t see them loudly enough to notice…)

I almost felt like I was back in Japan; the three-block audience a colony of bopping heads, hive well-wishers, appreciative observers, deep-thinking smilers and inactive silent revolutionaries.

There were tons of bands and people, but there were no practicing trouble starters, and no police.

Quite astounding really.

And, though I’m a strong proponent of subversive behavior, poking fun at the ordinary, and causing chaos for the sake of rocking the boat, it was still quite refreshing to see such a big event held with such relaxed maturity and class.

I'm starting to think these so-called Seattleites are actually just actors, playing chill peeps roles for my benefit. As soon as I sign a long-term rental lease and a work contract here, I'm expecting the syringes to start flowing through the streets, undulating under the weight of maniacal, pitchfork wielding, mutated politician clones with the blood of suburbanites dripping from their fangs.

But, maybe I'm just being paranoid.


dingobear said...

Maybe the docile people of the Pacific Northwest need someone like you to show them how to get a little crazy. C'mon -c, lead! Show them the way!

Cap'n Rich said...

Work contract? Did I miss something? Did you find work in a place that sounds like it's filled with un-American acting people?

Wow! Go for it.

Frustrated Writer said...

I'm with dingo here, you just might be the guru of enlightened partying that Seattle has been waiting for, a prophesy waiting to unfold.

I love the paranoid side of you!

Dunzo said...

Maybe you should rename your blog to "Up the creeek to Seattle"...I don't know.

The Ingrown Hare said...

Paranoia strikes deep
Into your life it will creep

It starts when you're always afraid
Step outta line
The man come
And take you aaaway!

You better stop children
What's that sound?
Everybody look what's going down

-c said...

dingobear & frustrated writer- I'll do my best! Though I'm not quite as crazy as I claim to be..., a calm in the water always calls for a wave!

cap'n rich- Yeah, have a few job offers among the "un-american-acting" peoples. Will let you know when I decide where to bring my silliness.

dunzo- not a bad idea. I definitely need to give it the Seattle swing here soon. Honestly, though, I'm really lazy when it comes to fixing up a blog site (as you can tell by the minimalism here at Up the Creek).

ingrown hare- hehe. I like the poem! but..., I'm still singing to myself after reading it...:)

L said...

"just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't really out to get you"