Sunday, November 19, 2006

Of Teet-sharing and Dear-Diarying

I’ve never been much for the I-went-here-today-saw-this-felt-that kind of blog post.

…Especially when the places been, the things seen, and the feelings felt are of the pretty mundane, had-orange-juice-and-coffee-for-breakfast-and-am-feeling-kinda-bloated ilk…

But, what can I say? I’m lazy, have been neglecting my blog a lot recently, and I had orange juice and coffee for breakfast today. And yes, I am feeling slightly bloated.

So, here goes the kind of post I usually hate:

My week in a shelled pair of nuts

Taught some English. Took some walks. Had a life-sized, self-defense doll sporting a green belt sit next to me on the bus. Unraveled the mysteries of when to use definite articles with uncountable nouns (mainly when the dry martini well at the party dries up…). Facilitated crude compare-contrast conversation with Japanese students at a bar after visiting a home-grown American sex shop. Hit a surprisingly decent open-mike night (spoken-worders, young-angsters, expired rockers, dark eccentrics and tabla poets). Became an official Washingtonian (the trip to the Department of Licensing was so amazingly stress-free that I might just as well have been getting a teet massage from Buddha himself). Checked out my dad’s recently uploaded site (so much for blogger anonymity!) Watched and was disappointed by Borat (c’mon! a little less drama, and a little more docu!). Was informed by my veiled Saudi Arabian student that humans used to live for thousands of years. Read some of this and this. Ate some burrito made by a white woman (go Seattle!). Drank some orange juice. Took a few shits….

And there we have it: my best attempt at a Dear Diary entry.

Well, the sooner I quit this uninspired post, the better.

(Yes, I’m still practicing my double comparatives!)

And, finally…, here’s a squirrel sucking from a momma dog’s lactating boob.

...yup.

11 comments:

dingobear said...

-c, what kind of a post was that? Haha, I kid, I kid ...

A squirrel sucking on dog boob was something I did not expect to see when I woke up this morning.

Your dad has a cool yacht.

Congratulations on becoming a citizen of the great state of Washington!

Cap'n Rich said...

Swell mental pictures! They might turn a lesser man on; but not me, not me, not me.

Ha ha, -c. Where ever do you find these thoughts in your head? Ha, ha again!

Frustrated Writer said...

I was thinking we might need more detail. As for a squirrel gaining nourishment at the teat of a dog, well, I'm thinking that just is wrong since the dog's job is to eliminate the flea ridden disease carrying beasts. Sigh. I'm off to do my own "dear diary".

ted said...

Read your post. Had a mental reaction. Pushed some keys. Sent this comment. Hit another ke--

Dunzo said...

Didn't like Borat? It's getting rave reviews including one from my weekend supervisor......rethinking weekend supervisor.....anyways, I am okay with admitting that I liked this post. It was easier for me to walk through and in contrast to your tastes, I enjoyed this leisurely walk through -C's week. Though don't get me wrong, some of the alliteration you are inspired with is inspiring.


[CAUTION, THIS COMMENT MAY BE DELETED BY -C FOR FEAR THAT I AM SLANDERING ONE OF HER OTHER LOVELY READERS. LET IT BE KNOWN THAT I AM NOT SLANDERING ANY OF YOU. PEACE!]

Dad said...

The squirrel and I made it into your blog post. I feel honored to be in such good company.

dingobear said...

Happy Thanksgiving, -c!

-c said...

dingobear- What greater joy in life can there be than to awake to visions of canine hooter-sucking rodents?

cap'n rich- again, it's hard to control urges of libido when you see puppies and rodents snuggling together...:)

frustrated- I'm afraid a more detailed DearDiary would only become more boring... Happy Thanksgiving to you! I'm sure you're celebrating with the family!

ted- read your comment. had 'nog and kyo thoughts. started typ--

dunzo- actually, I DID like Borat's movie. I've just been watching Cohen's work and tv shows for years, and had higher expectations. I just wanted more, unscripted interviews that take the piss out of people. I still recommend it, though!

dad- Wow! Hi! Yeah, being in the company of a squirrel really isn't all that bad. Why, I've been at parties where the only dullards worth talking to kept stroking their fluffy tails and shoving nuts into the recesses of their cheeks:)

dingobear- Thanks! Happy arbitrary day in canada to you!

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